This week, I started culling digital photos from 2007 for a scrapbook project. (It’s overwhelming to be that far behind!) Anyway, I just came across a folder of photos from the time my husband took our youngest son to the car show for a daddy/son day. Sadly, there aren’t any photos of my husband at this event. Not even a reflection of him in one of the cars’ shiny exteriors. 🙁 This discovery started me thinking about how there aren’t enough photos of him with the kids even from times when he could have handed the camera to me.
Note to the photographer in the family:
Hand the camera off to someone else occasionally. It is important for you to get in these photos.
There are probably lots of reasons he didn’t ask anyone to take their photo together at the car show that day:
- He was still recovering from a bone marrow transplant and may have been concerned about his appearance.
- He didn’t want to pay for the dream car photo-op because we were in debt up to our eyeballs to the Cleveland Clinic and, at the time, I probably would have fussed over a $10 photo on top of the cost of admission.
But I think it was mostly:
- He was having such a great time watching Ethan play and pretend to drive these amazing cars that he truly just didn’t think about it.
Anyway, my point is this:
You need to get in the photo!
“I’ll get in the photos when I lose 10 pounds”
Do you realize that by saying you need to lose a few pounds or that you hate your hair or your smile or whatever, you are actually sending the message that you aren’t worthy to be photographed with your family? That is ridiculous! We’ve all heard the saying that we are our own worst critics, right? If you are critical of something now, there is probably never going to be a time when you feel totally comfortable being photographed. (Here’s a little secret: You are not alone in this–most people are uncomfortable being in front of the camera.) But, trust me, your kids do not care that you aren’t perfect! In fact, unless you go around bringing attention to whatever perceived flaw you have, they aren’t even aware you have one. So, please stop putting it off!
Perspective
Going through these photos and finding that my husband wasn’t in any of them was disappointing, but it wasn’t a total loss. As fond as he was of fast cars, it is obvious that the star of the show that day was my son. Clearly, they had a blast sitting in all those drivers’ seats. I was glad I hadn’t culled these images before Jeff died because I might have deleted some of the not-so-perfect shots, and it was the whole group of photos clued me in to his perspective. Today, I am enjoying even the photos where the focus was soft or the exposure was off because all these photos together gave me a glimpse of the details that caught his eye. Which was almost like being there with him and having him point them out to me himself. And I can feel how much he enjoyed sharing the day with our son.
But, I still wish he had thought to get in the photo, too. 🙂
All photos taken by Jeff Zwart at the Feb. 2007 Cleveland Car Show.